People share workplace horror stories from microwaving tuna to grim toilet tales

News

While some colleagues form beautiful friendships – others can’t even stand being in the same room.

And bad workplace etiquette doesn’t help.

From stinking out the office with tuna sarnies, to giving updates on trips to the bathroom, there are no shortages of gripes co-workers often have to put up with.

Although many of us around the country are working from home due to the coronaviurus pandemic, it hasn’t stopped Reddit users reflecting on colleagues’ habits that really annoy them.

One told how they worked for a company where they hired a secretary who refused to use a computer.

“I couldn’t f***ing believe it, in this day and age,” they said.

Another found their co-worker living in the office with his family.

“We found a mattress folded up in the warehouse,” they wrote.

“He and his family (not just him living in the office!) left discarded food everywhere like pizza crusts in the toilet brush holder in the bathroom.

“They left hair in the sink in the bathroom as they were obviously bathing in there, too, as we had no actual bathing facilities in the office.”

They added that the man was eventually let go from the engineering company.

Another Reddit user became increasingly infuriated by his colleague’s apparent need to share his toilet movements with the kitchen.

“This guy named Daniel I used to work with at McDonald’s in high school,” they explained.

“He let everyone know he worked out and enjoyed being on the football team. He had this thing about taking five s**** a day.

“He would walk by on his way back from the toilet, chest out, shoulders back and triumphantly announce “that’s s*** number five!”

One commenter recalled how one of their colleagues decided to scent the office after the company introduced a ban on perfumes.

They wrote: “This is about 15 years ago but the office I worked in instituted a scent free policy.

“One woman, who was already insufferable, was so offended by it that she snuck in her perfume collection.

“She’d walk down the halls and spray perfume into empty offices or cubicles when no one was looking or before everyone arrived in the morning.

“This went on for well over a month or two and we had no idea who was responsible. My coworkers and I started referring to this mysterious person as the Chanel Bandit.

“She was finally caught on camera in the act. She’d left for three weeks vacation and was unaware that we had installed cameras after a break in.

“Some of us already suspected her, as the Chanel Bandit mysteriously stopped spraying while she was away.

“She quit right after she was caught. None of us were sad to see that cedar scented psycho leave.”

Reddit user inu-yasha remembered a colleague who would railroad them in conversations.

“My coworker likes to initiate conversations, then does long pauses where you go to say something back, then he cuts you off and keeps talking,” inu explained.

“He has entire conversations almost entirely by himself.”

AtlantaFieldClowns looked back not too fondly on a co-worker with something of a motivation problem.

They wrote : “Worked with a girl who would sometimes just lay on the floor and play on her phone.

“She would routinely flip out about something her boyfriend did and just start screaming curse words, sometimes in front of customers.

“She was eventually fired for smoking weed while on the clock.”

RedTiger013 span a yarn about a colleague called Dan.

“Dan was 37 working at a dead end job as a lab specimen processor in a windowless room for nine hours a day,” the commenter recalled.

“He ate only Burgerking, but without the lettuce because that’s “rabbit food”. He drank literally a gallon of Mountain Dew a day, and was confused as to why people were horrified by that. ‘There’s water in it’ he would say.

“Apparently if he ate corn he would vomit and have to go to the hospital. He would tell me he firmly believed that man and dinosaur roamed the earth at the same time, along with many other “theories” that came from his “gut”.

“One day we got into a political argument before the 2016 election where he said ‘if Bernie Sanders is elected president, there will be a civil war, and I will not hesitate to kill you and your family’.

“Dan was fired. I got out of there as soon as I could. Don’t be like Dan.”

Kether_Nefesh had an extreme example of the age old problem of people cooking smelly food in the office.

“I’m pretty cool about eh, people all have their role to play, but one time we had a secretary that would microwave eggs and canned tuna every morning in a bowl,” Kether explained.

“Now… I am not a violent person, but the smell generated from microwaved eggs and canned tuna is down right repulsive by anyone’s standards.”

“Then I noticed food going missing. Then supplies started going missing. Then a customer told me that he had been adding auto 30% tips his food purchases.

“When I looked at the books, I saw that he had been adding 30% tips to ALL the credit card sales. And the cash rings were off from what should have been sold. I fired him that day.

“The next day he came in and apologized. Said he was on drugs and was going to rehab. I wished him well. Then next day he tried to break in after close and was caught. Idiot.”